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Passage 2
One of the many things that is common to humans across cultures is the need to belong and be accepted by others.This is one of the reasons people seek to spend time bonding with family, friends, hobby-buddies, sports fans, and religious groups. But why do humans need to belong? The answer people always received might be "Because humans are social animals!"
Social psychologists have been studying our need for belonging for over a century and one of the most famous studies on this subject was done by Abraham Maslow who in 1943 proposed that this human need to belong was one of the five basic needs required for self-actualization. In fact, after physiological needs (like food and sleep) and safety needs, he ranked the need for belonging as the next level up in his Hierarchy of Needs".
“Survival for the fittest” is probably another answer you will hear when you ask “why do I have to fit in?”.This phrase was invented by Herbert Spencer in Principles of Biology(1864) to describe Charles Darwin's theory of natural selection of living species. By the early 1900’s it was being applied from biology to other areas, like social studies. Simply put, it means that those best fit in the particular conditions or environment will survive in the long run.
According to a paper by psychologists Roy Baumeister and Mark Leary, It’s because of a fundamental “need to belong”. The "belongingness hyoptheisstates" that people have a basic psychological need to feel closely connected to others, and that caring bonds from close relationships are a major part of human behavior.
In another word, it means that it is a basic human instinct although some value it more than others. We, as social beings, all want to fit in and to belong.In order to achieve that, most of us often present slightly different versions of who we are, depending on the environment and who we are with. We might have many edition’s of ourselves- for work, or at home or even online. All modified or changed in order to be accepted in that particular situation. Like the Psychologist William James once said," A man has as many social selves as there are distinct groups of persons about social selves as there are distinct groups of persons about whose opinion he cares. He generally shows a different side of himself to each of these different groups."
This works very well for most of us, but some people only have one version of themselves topresent. As a doctor working in psychiatry, I meet a lot of people who do not belong. They are unable, or unwilling, to change themselves to fit society's expectations. Because their behavior or appearance are different from most of the people, they are the goats among the herd of sheep. We may think their hair is a little too long, their clothes a little unusual or they may also have mental problems. And the true sadness is that people who are different from others are more likely to have mental health problems. These problems are not usually because they are wrong being goats but because how they are treated by the sheep. If they are not loved or even not respected as who they are, life can be very difficult. It is a lot of pressure to be a goat in a world full of sheep. AS a result, some of them just end up trying to be the sheep.
In social psychology, this questions answerable by the concept of information social influence. This usually happens to a person who lacks knowledge and seeks guidance from the group. When a person is in a difficult situation and he does not know what to do,he is more likely to depend on others instead of thinking for himself information conformity also applies to not knowing what to do in a crisis, where an immediate action is needed.People tend to learn from others because it is much easier to solve the problem and ease the fears.
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